#Momsplaining with Kristen Bell: Babies, Babies Everywhere, Part 2

Brought to you by the magic convention, the epidural. What’s also magical, the new Johnson’s products, improved inside and out. Let’s go catch some babies. Hi, I’m Kristen. A lot of hurry up and wait, huh? I got another patient in the other room. Next one, give me a big push. My heart’s racing so […]

#Momsplaining with Kristen Bell: PregnancyRealness

#Momsplaining with Kristen Bell: Babies, Babies Everywhere, Part 1

Hi, I’m Kristen Bell. You might remember me from the movie Pootie Tang. Speaking of pootie tang, I’m here today in a labor and delivery room. Because what’s more beautiful than bringing a brand new slimy, squished up little person into the world? Nothing. That was rhetorical. I’ve done it twice, so I feel pretty […]

Ellen Can’t Imagine Being Pregnant

Welcome to our Mother’s Day show. Today, my audience is filled with first time expectant moms. [APPLAUSE] Of course, I have never been pregnant, and that’s because that wasn’t a mint I tossed in my mouth. That’s birth control. I do it every day. Congratulations to all of you. You’re doing something that I can’t […]

Kim Kardashian Lets Gender of Third Child Slip

You look fantastic. Thank you. You look fantastic. Thank you. You really do. Thank you. And to think you’re having a baby any time. I mean, that– you look– well, I’m not pregnant. You’re not. Yeah. Someone else is pregnant. So you’ll have a child soon. Soon, yes, very soon. Yes, how are the other […]

Ellen Invites Pregnant Teachers at Kansas School to Mother’s Day Show

A few weeks ago, this photo of seven teachers from Oak Street Elementary in Goddard, Kansas went viral, because they were all pregnant at the same time. We gathered all of the teachers in one room, since pregnancy is obviously contagious there. So let’s see them. Where are they? There they are. OK, I didn’t […]

‘The Bachelorette’ Hannah B. Is Ready to Unleash the Beast

Hi, Hannah B. Hey, Ellen. Hi. Congratulations. Thank you. And they loved you when they found out that it was you. Yes! I love you. So did you have any idea? I mean, that– did you, like, talk to anybody and go, hey, if I get kicked off can I be the Bachelorette? No. That’s […]

Khloe Kardashian Talks ‘Surreal’ First Pregnancy and Possible Marriage

Like a vision in white. Trying to be all virginal. Yeah, is that what you’re doing? Yeah, virginal and all. Speaking of that, do you check your phone during sex? No! I do not. I’m not one of that– what– 67%. 62%. 62. That’s a lot of people that do that. So are you sure? […]

Ellen Has a Big Surprise for Viral McDonald’s Pranksters

If you watch my show, you know that I love pranks. I like scaring people, and I like making celebrities wear an ear piece. And I tell them to say things. And they can only do whatever I tell them to do. I love hiding Andy’s phone and watching him have a panic attack. And […]

Jennifer Garner Didn’t Trust Her Pregnancy Test

So you have three kids. I do. How old are they? 12, 9, 6. 12, 9, 6. So girls and a boy. And Violet is 12. Yes. And what was it like when you found out the first time you were pregnant with Violet? I woke up that morning– You were only pregnant with her […]