The day my second son was born started as any other ordinary day.
My older son had his
last session on the swimming school in the morning.
Little did i know what was gonna happen. The evening of 29th July, i wrote this in my diary:
“But i think my contractions has felt more intense down my
lower abdomen, groin and legs today.
Oh, i got a contraction just now that was pretty intense.
You can always hope.” “They have been stronger but not so frequent.
I had a contraction now that felt pretty strong back my butt and down in my
Ouch ouch ouch. HOPING HOPING!!!=)
The time is 18:48 at the moment.
Just a note, if it actually start tonight. ^^” A friend had just arrived for a movienight at our place when my contractions
suddenly got stronger. Every contraction was stronger than the last one. I called the birth-center and asked for advice since i had bad diarrhea and had heard that could cause
alot of pre contractions. It got decided that it was probably good if we came in anyway. Our friend stayed and guarded my sleeping son until my mother arrived.The last toilett-visit,
my mucus plug had came out. Was it maybe time anyway – for real? Nervous and full of expectation we gave eachother a very speciell glance
before we sat down in the car and went away. Well, 29th of June, and the time is 23:10…
aaand we have 2 minutes between the contractions! On our way to Lycksele. Eeehm, the question is if we´ll have the time to record any
more than this so i just make a…well..notice that something is happening at least! At 23:35, Enrolment
When we arrived, my legs had started to go numb for some reason. I got to
sit down in a wheelchair and then we took the elevator up to the seventh floor. I got to meet my midwife and got shown into a delivery-room where they examined me and
noted that i was dilated 4 cm with 1 cm edge left with bulging membranes. I got hooked up to the machines for about 25 minutes, wich showed that
the baby was fine and that my contractions was frequent and strong. Right before midnight we got transferred to “The cozy room” where they had a
bathtub. I also got a big ball to sit on and a walking-table. The ball never got used thought, or even tried out, unfortunately. In the beginning i hade pretty good control on the pain. I rolled my
hips and pushed it forward during the contractions and focused on breathing. It felt very positive and i was not worried. Make the home such that once little has become big, the best
in life he has seen was home, father and mother. “Daddy-bed” Because of my bad stomach i got tense during the contraction not to shit myself, hehe.
If you tense you get more pain and i started getting dizzy and powerless. My earlier kinda numbed legs almost didnt carry me anymore after all toilet-visits.
Im sure you know how tired you can get from diarrhea… I could´nt stand up and move around as i wanted to and could´nt handle the pain as i would
have done standing. All visits to the toilet also became a distraction wich made it difficult to focus. My mediocre tries to go into myself and relax failed. I can not
today understand why i never even thought of trying the ball. At 01:00, Nitrous oxide. Me, who was set on not using any pain relief, felt like
it was a setback using the nitrous oxide after all, but i had to. Or, i chose to, to be sure to last all the way. No one knew
how long it was gonna take and if we would have some complications. The pain got too strong when i couldnt stand up and “dance” and the panic
started to crawl upon me. I felt like i didnt have any control anymore. I dont know if the nitrous oxide actually made any difference but it had
a calming effect to have the mask over my face to scream in. I wish i could have calmed down and breathed instead of screaming, but i got panic
from my numbed legs, the dizzyness, nausea, my very troublesome stomach and the pain. At 01:36, Dilated 6 cm. the midwife examined me and noted that i was dilated
6 cm. From this point forward the progress, for some reason, went pretty fast. The contractions suddenly got very intense. 1 hour and
7 minutes from here, it was done. From here to when i started pushing, my memory is very vague. At 02:26, Erge to push. 51 minutes after
i was noted dilated 6 cm. In the middle of a very strong contraction it started
feeling different, like i had to crap. I realized i was standing on my toes and felt i just had to focus the force down
instead of “escape upwards” and i immediately got more control – i wanted to start pushing. The midwife told me to lay down so she could examine me
and hook me up to the machines for a little while. I laid down on the side and felt the
enormous powers from my deepest animal within. Now i didnt scream anymore. More like bellowing. It was a relief to get to start pushing. The pain
was´nt pain anymore – it was a huge FORCE! From this point i remember everything – every second, every detail. I could feel
the pressure and how the baby distinctly moved down in my pelvis. I remember every thought – how amazing powers my body posessed. About the
relief to start pushing and my anticipation to soon meet my child. The realization that we would soon have a son or a daughter. That it would
soon be done…
I felt peace and acceptance – no fear or panic anymore. The waiting between the contractions felt very long for us both.
I relaxed and rested.
fiance took his chance to give me som encouraging words and body contact. During the contractions though i was completely focused on the work
i was doing and preferred to be left alone. At 02:34 – my water broke.
8minutes after i started pushing. With a sudden click and a splash, an enormous amount of amniotic fluid spurted over the
bed all the way down on the floor below the foot end of the bed. The midwife, who only seconds before had been standing at
the foot end of the bed said That was the water that broke. I was lucky i wasnt standing there anymore! When the membranes burst the enormous pressure i had felt that kept me from
pushing was suddenly gone and it immediately got more effect.
Listen for the splash… Thats when the real bellowing started. Maybe its difficult to believe that i felt peace and acceptance when i sound like something
from “the exorcist”, hehe.
But my sounds was due to the huge powers from the contractions. I wasnt sure if it was time to push just
yet so i let the power out by bellowing. It sounded alot worse than it was and it was scary for
my partner who thought i was bellowing because of pain. During the pushing i couldnt controll my bowel wich resulted in flowing
Thats how it can end up if you are unlucky. Fortunately its not the first time in history that happens
and that the midwife was experienced and professional. She just said: Now im just wiping alittle here. But of course i was miserable. Who want to lay with a bare ass
in front of her partner and a stranger and shit herself? Haha The midwife: Is it a pressure now? The midwife: Now its important that you only
push when you are having a contraction. The midwife: Now try to save your voice and put the force downward instead! The midwife: And rest. When the contraction ends you rest. The midwife: You can push the button there now. Elisabeth can come
now because the babys head is just inside here now. And remember to save your voice now and put
the force down instead. Just like that! Just like that. Good. Now we have someone just inside here. Midwife #2: Mhm, how nice. Did i fall asleep or…? You are doing great! You are doing really good! Second last contraction-paus before birth. I was puffing with the baby
right inside when it suddenly slides right in again. It felt so distinctly – and what a cool feeling!
Then i really understood that it was a baby in there and
how tight it would be on the way out.
Amazing that you can remember a feeling in the body that clear. The midwife: You were pushing just perfect! Me: Now it slipped in again! The midwifes: Haha, did you feel that?! Just like that! Perfect! Should you puff a while like that now?! Now we wait for the next contractions because you need help with this now! Do you still have a contraction? Great! Now here we have someone! Born 02:42, 30/6-2012
in week 40+5
after 16 minutes of pushing
Lenght: 50 cm
Headmeasure: 37 cm …and all healthy and well-shaped! Hi! Oh…sweetheart! Nice work all three of you! We got a little boy anywhow! 1 ½ minute old dad Newly become mom of two Congratulations! Did you get angry?! Alexander – our new life! Oh my… how awefull that was! Was it terrible? …terrible things….